Now, I'm not talking about the kind of impatience that causes anger leading to spouse or child abuse, I'll leave that to the professionals. What I am talking about is impatience leading to raising your voice or saying things "in the heat of the moment" that you will regret later. You all know what you can say to your wife that would hurt her the most, do you choose to say that thing and hurt her? Also, when your 2 yr-old son poops on the floor, do you get angry, or laugh it off? (This actually happened yesterday, but I was excited because it was his first time not in his diaper!)
In fact, even if your impatience is not directed at your wife or children it can still have a negative impact. For example, there have been so many times where I've been playing basketball, driving, or even watching sports on TV when I've done something out of anger or frustration. This is huge disappointment and embarrassment to my wife.
What can we do to improve it? believe me, I have tried many things to improve my patience, so let me share with you two things that I have found to help. It is a difficult road, I am still walking down it, but these things have helped:
- Pray for patience - Many people need help being patient. When you get angry, you feel powerless to control it. God can give us this power.
- Give yourself a "timeout" - I actually learned this from my wife (she uses it very successfully) when you feel angry, but before you act on it, get away from the situation. Do everything you can to remove yourself from the source of your anger....temporarily. Come back in a few minutes when you feel confident you will behave appropriately.
Hi Eric! Great post... I am interested in having you guest blog on my site. I couldn't get an email to go through to you with the email listed on your site. if possible, please contact me at julie@intimacyinmarriage.com. THANKS! Julie
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